It's GMU basketball season!

My favorite time of the year is here--no, not autumn--I'm talking about basketball season! GMU played it's one exhibition game of the season last night, a 100-82 victory over Virginia State.

It was guys' night at the Patriot Center as I took my boys with me. I didn't know how they would do--as they have grown older their attention spans seem to shorten. But it was a truly fantastic evening.

I got the boys excited early, telling them in the morning where we were going, and helping them practice their "Go Mason!" yells throughout the day. C woke up from his afternoon nap shouting, "I'm ready to go to the basketball game!

The ride up was fun, talking about the upcoming game, singing and laughing. At one point B started praying (he has been praying with me at the table lately), saying, "Dear God, thank you for our food." C melted my heart by saying, "God, thank you for Daddy!"

We got to the arena, picked up tickets that Ken and Andy left for us at will call, and headed for the Patriot Club (where people who donate a lot of money get "free" food and beer). Kenny gave me a pass, which I handed to the portly usher at the entrance. He looked at the double stroller and said, "You gotta have three tickets."

I smiled and said, "Come one, they're toddlers, they're not gonna drink any beer!" He waved me through. Kenny got us some pizza and drinks and we began the celebration. The guys were amazed at how the boys have grown.

We finished dinner and headed to the seats. I handed C to Kenny and climbed to our seats with Brady. I reached out to take C back, but he had planted himself on Kenny's lap, and stayed there for much of the first half. He later sat with Johnny for a while--I love how he enjoys being with all the guys.

B wanted to sit in his own seat--it was funny because he wasn't heavy enough to keep the seat from folding up on him. At halftime we walked around the concourse--C rode on my shoulders while B held hands with Kenny and Johnny as they ran and picked him up to fly through the air. He was loving it.

The boys made it through the whole game--cheering often, clapping when the band played, being thrilled by the small blimp that flies through the arena. They switched places in the second half; B sitting with Kenny and C in his own seat. When they got restless late in the game, lollipops helped them get through to the end.

It was so fun watching my friends laughing and playing with my boys, and seeing how much the boys loved the guys. B loves Andy, who always makes him laugh. Johnny was great chasing the boys in and out of a curtained off area, then being told not to go back there (I think by the same usher who let me in the Patriot Club).

But the highlight for me was a moment when I looked over at C sitting on Kenny's lap, and watched C touching and fiddling with Kenny's fingers as they both watched the action on the court. One of those real "Life is good" moments. Thanks guys.

(this is reprinted from our family blog--which is available by invitation only. let me know if you'd like an invite.)

The boys' first high school football game

(from our family blog)

Friday night I took the boys to their first high school football game. I've been subbing at North Stafford, and they were hosting their rival Stafford for homecoming. It was cold and wet, but the boys were eager, and I really wanted to take them to watch football.

Walking into the stadium was exciting. There was a light but thick rain falling; it looked really cool in the stadium lights. The band was playing, and there were teenagers everywhere. We found seats just before kick-off; I had packed dinner--sandwiches, grapes and cookies--so we started eating.

The boys were enjoying it--cheering when people cheered, watching the guys run up and down the field, listening to the band and the cheerleaders.

Early in the second quarter B said he wanted to go home, and began to repeat the request. We were all getting colder and wetter. I tried to get him to hold out till halftime, but he kept saying he wanted to leave, so we left near the end of the first half.

Halfway to the van, B changed his mind and said he wanted to go back and watch football. I told him that we had to go home, and he started to lose it. I had to drag/carry him to the van. He was tired, and when he's tired and gets focused on something, he doesn't let go.

The whole way home, every thirty seconds: "Daddy! I want to go back and watch the football! Please! (with lots of tears)."

After about 10 minutes of this, C spoke up, "No, we're going home!" It was classic.

It was really cool to experience another first with my boys. I remembered how fun those nights were as a teenager, and thought about how my boys would be out there in a few years, either playing or watching.

But for now, I love sharing all these special times with them, and I'm so grateful for each one.

North Stafford won 35-7.

the present

I've always been skeptical when I hear people say, "God told me..."

I've never heard God speak. But there have been times when I get the sense that God is trying to tell me something--through other people, something I read, the Spirit inside...

I've been getting that lately in this idea of living in the present. A few different friends have touched on this, and some different things I've been reading. In doing some self-examination, I was amazed to realize how little time I truly spend living in the moment.

I spend a little time looking back, remembering good times, questioning myself or others over things I wish were different. But I spend a LOT of time looking ahead--wondering, worrying, playing out different scenarios--and most of it is not productive.

As a result, I spend very little time truly living in the present. Enjoying where I am, who I'm with--not thinking about the past or the future, just really experiencing life right now...the sights, sounds and the smells...(can anyone name the movie reference?)

So this week I'm working on living in the present. Not letting worries about tomorrow get in the way. I do this best with my kids. They truly live in the present, and they help me do it as well. When I'm with them, just being--those are times when I really sense God's presence as well.

FBS's (first born son) first day of preschool

From our family blog:

B had his first day of preschool today. I know this is just the first of many milestones, but it was a big deal to me...I still get surprised at how emotional I become.

B was born a little over three years ago. My memory is pretty bad these days, but I remember so much about that day. J went into labor while at work; I went to pick her up and she tried to keep on working. Her co-workers forced her to leave, and we finally got on the road to the hospital.

By the time we got there her contractions were coming faster. We tried to walk from the parking lot, but she couldn't get very far so we drove to the emergency room and I got her inside. Her labor went quickly, and a few hours later Brady was born.

A lot of people cry when their babies are born, but I started crying about five minutes before B came out. I realized that this little person we had been talking and singing to and touching and loving was about to come and join us fully. I was filled with this amazing joy and began to cry.

When he came out, all messy and gooey, he was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

When I look back to that day, the last three years seem to have gone by in a blur. B is no longer a baby, he's a wonderful little boy with lots of personality, incredibly bright, and so much fun.

As we walked up the sidewalk toward his preschool, my eyes filled with tears as I thought that he is no longer completely ours--he also belongs to others with whom he will now build new relationships.

It was all worth it four hours later when I picked him up--he saw me come to the door of his class, yelled "Daddy!" and ran into my arms. I love being a dad.

President Obama to US students

I started a blog about the ridiculous protesting over the President's speech to students. Scrapped it and decided to just let the President speak:

Prepared Remarks of President Barack Obama
Back to School Event

Arlington, Virginia
September 8, 2009

The President: Hello everyone – how’s everybody doing today? I’m here with students at Wakefield High School in Arlington, Virginia. And we’ve got students tuning in from all across America, kindergarten through twelfth grade. I’m glad you all could join us today.

I know that for many of you, today is the first day of school. And for those of you in kindergarten, or starting middle or high school, it’s your first day in a new school, so it’s understandable if you’re a little nervous. I imagine there are some seniors out there who are feeling pretty good right now, with just one more year to go. And no matter what grade you’re in, some of you are probably wishing it were still summer, and you could’ve stayed in bed just a little longer this morning.

I know that feeling. When I was young, my family lived in Indonesia for a few years, and my mother didn’t have the money to send me where all the American kids went to school. So she decided to teach me extra lessons herself, Monday through Friday – at 4:30 in the morning.

Now I wasn’t too happy about getting up that early. A lot of times, I’d fall asleep right there at the kitchen table. But whenever I’d complain, my mother would just give me one of those looks and say, "This is no picnic for me either, buster."

So I know some of you are still adjusting to being back at school. But I’m here today because I have something important to discuss with you. I’m here because I want to talk with you about your education and what’s expected of all of you in this new school year.

Now I’ve given a lot of speeches about education. And I’ve talked a lot about responsibility.

I’ve talked about your teachers’ responsibility for inspiring you, and pushing you to learn.

I’ve talked about your parents’ responsibility for making sure you stay on track, and get your homework done, and don’t spend every waking hour in front of the TV or with that Xbox.

I’ve talked a lot about your government’s responsibility for setting high standards, supporting teachers and principals, and turning around schools that aren’t working where students aren’t getting the opportunities they deserve.

But at the end of the day, we can have the most dedicated teachers, the most supportive parents, and the best schools in the world – and none of it will matter unless all of you fulfill your responsibilities. Unless you show up to those schools; pay attention to those teachers; listen to your parents, grandparents and other adults; and put in the hard work it takes to succeed.

And that’s what I want to focus on today: the responsibility each of you has for your education. I want to start with the responsibility you have to yourself.

Every single one of you has something you’re good at. Every single one of you has something to offer. And you have a responsibility to yourself to discover what that is. That’s the opportunity an education can provide.

Maybe you could be a good writer – maybe even good enough to write a book or articles in a newspaper – but you might not know it until you write a paper for your English class. Maybe you could be an innovator or an inventor – maybe even good enough to come up with the next iPhone or a new medicine or vaccine – but you might not know it until you do a project for your science class. Maybe you could be a mayor or a Senator or a Supreme Court Justice, but you might not know that until you join student government or the debate team.

And no matter what you want to do with your life – I guarantee that you’ll need an education to do it. You want to be a doctor, or a teacher, or a police officer? You want to be a nurse or an architect, a lawyer or a member of our military? You’re going to need a good education for every single one of those careers. You can’t drop out of school and just drop into a good job. You’ve got to work for it and train for it and learn for it.

And this isn’t just important for your own life and your own future. What you make of your education will decide nothing less than the future of this country. What you’re learning in school today will determine whether we as a nation can meet our greatest challenges in the future.

You’ll need the knowledge and problem-solving skills you learn in science and math to cure diseases like cancer and AIDS, and to develop new energy technologies and protect our environment. You’ll need the insights and critical thinking skills you gain in history and social studies to fight poverty and homelessness, crime and discrimination, and make our nation more fair and more free. You’ll need the creativity and ingenuity you develop in all your classes to build new companies that will create new jobs and boost our economy.

We need every single one of you to develop your talents, skills and intellect so you can help solve our most difficult problems. If you don’t do that – if you quit on school – you’re not just quitting on yourself, you’re quitting on your country.

Now I know it’s not always easy to do well in school. I know a lot of you have challenges in your lives right now that can make it hard to focus on your schoolwork.

I get it. I know what that’s like. My father left my family when I was two years old, and I was raised by a single mother who struggled at times to pay the bills and wasn’t always able to give us things the other kids had. There were times when I missed having a father in my life. There were times when I was lonely and felt like I didn’t fit in.

So I wasn’t always as focused as I should have been. I did some things I’m not proud of, and got in more trouble than I should have. And my life could have easily taken a turn for the worse.

But I was fortunate. I got a lot of second chances and had the opportunity to go to college, and law school, and follow my dreams. My wife, our First Lady Michelle Obama, has a similar story. Neither of her parents had gone to college, and they didn’t have much. But they worked hard, and she worked hard, so that she could go to the best schools in this country.

Some of you might not have those advantages. Maybe you don’t have adults in your life who give you the support that you need. Maybe someone in your family has lost their job, and there’s not enough money to go around. Maybe you live in a neighborhood where you don’t feel safe, or have friends who are pressuring you to do things you know aren’t right.

But at the end of the day, the circumstances of your life – what you look like, where you come from, how much money you have, what you’ve got going on at home – that’s no excuse for neglecting your homework or having a bad attitude. That’s no excuse for talking back to your teacher, or cutting class, or dropping out of school. That’s no excuse for not trying.

Where you are right now doesn’t have to determine where you’ll end up. No one’s written your destiny for you. Here in America, you write your own destiny. You make your own future.

That’s what young people like you are doing every day, all across America.

Young people like Jazmin Perez, from Roma, Texas. Jazmin didn’t speak English when she first started school. Hardly anyone in her hometown went to college, and neither of her parents had gone either. But she worked hard, earned good grades, got a scholarship to Brown University, and is now in graduate school, studying public health, on her way to being Dr. Jazmin Perez.

I’m thinking about Andoni Schultz, from Los Altos, California, who’s fought brain cancer since he was three. He’s endured all sorts of treatments and surgeries, one of which affected his memory, so it took him much longer – hundreds of extra hours – to do his schoolwork. But he never fell behind, and he’s headed to college this fall.

And then there’s Shantell Steve, from my hometown of Chicago, Illinois. Even when bouncing from foster home to foster home in the toughest neighborhoods, she managed to get a job at a local health center; start a program to keep young people out of gangs; and she’s on track to graduate high school with honors and go on to college.

Jazmin, Andoni and Shantell aren’t any different from any of you. They faced challenges in their lives just like you do. But they refused to give up. They chose to take responsibility for their education and set goals for themselves. And I expect all of you to do the same.

That’s why today, I’m calling on each of you to set your own goals for your education – and to do everything you can to meet them. Your goal can be something as simple as doing all your homework, paying attention in class, or spending time each day reading a book. Maybe you’ll decide to get involved in an extracurricular activity, or volunteer in your community. Maybe you’ll decide to stand up for kids who are being teased or bullied because of who they are or how they look, because you believe, like I do, that all kids deserve a safe environment to study and learn. Maybe you’ll decide to take better care of yourself so you can be more ready to learn. And along those lines, I hope you’ll all wash your hands a lot, and stay home from school when you don’t feel well, so we can keep people from getting the flu this fall and winter.

Whatever you resolve to do, I want you to commit to it. I want you to really work at it.

I know that sometimes, you get the sense from TV that you can be rich and successful without any hard work -- that your ticket to success is through rapping or basketball or being a reality TV star, when chances are, you’re not going to be any of those things.

But the truth is, being successful is hard. You won’t love every subject you study. You won’t click with every teacher. Not every homework assignment will seem completely relevant to your life right this minute. And you won’t necessarily succeed at everything the first time you try.

That’s OK. Some of the most successful people in the world are the ones who’ve had the most failures. JK Rowling’s first Harry Potter book was rejected twelve times before it was finally published. Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team, and he lost hundreds of games and missed thousands of shots during his career. But he once said, "I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."

These people succeeded because they understand that you can’t let your failures define you – you have to let them teach you. You have to let them show you what to do differently next time. If you get in trouble, that doesn’t mean you’re a troublemaker, it means you need to try harder to behave. If you get a bad grade, that doesn’t mean you’re stupid, it just means you need to spend more time studying.

No one’s born being good at things, you become good at things through hard work. You’re not a varsity athlete the first time you play a new sport. You don’t hit every note the first time you sing a song. You’ve got to practice. It’s the same with your schoolwork. You might have to do a math problem a few times before you get it right, or read something a few times before you understand it, or do a few drafts of a paper before it’s good enough to hand in.

Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. I do that every day. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength. It shows you have the courage to admit when you don’t know something, and to learn something new. So find an adult you trust – a parent, grandparent or teacher; a coach or counselor – and ask them to help you stay on track to meet your goals.

And even when you’re struggling, even when you’re discouraged, and you feel like other people have given up on you – don’t ever give up on yourself. Because when you give up on yourself, you give up on your country.

The story of America isn’t about people who quit when things got tough. It’s about people who kept going, who tried harder, who loved their country too much to do anything less than their best.

It’s the story of students who sat where you sit 250 years ago, and went on to wage a revolution and found this nation. Students who sat where you sit 75 years ago who overcame a Depression and won a world war; who fought for civil rights and put a man on the moon. Students who sat where you sit 20 years ago who founded Google, Twitter and Facebook and changed the way we communicate with each other.

So today, I want to ask you, what’s your contribution going to be? What problems are you going to solve? What discoveries will you make? What will a president who comes here in twenty or fifty or one hundred years say about what all of you did for this country?

Your families, your teachers, and I are doing everything we can to make sure you have the education you need to answer these questions. I’m working hard to fix up your classrooms and get you the books, equipment and computers you need to learn. But you’ve got to do your part too. So I expect you to get serious this year. I expect you to put your best effort into everything you do. I expect great things from each of you. So don’t let us down – don’t let your family or your country or yourself down. Make us all proud. I know you can do it.

Thank you, God bless you, and God bless America.

personal update

OK, time to talk about something else, I don't want this blog to just be about politics, and don't want it to always be a debate.

Maybe a little personal update. (If you're not interested in that, I won't be offended if you stop reading here).

I left Convergence two months ago. It's been an interesting time. I've kept in touch with a couple of my closer friends there, but haven't communicate with most of the people. I miss them. But I also find myself hesitating to reach out.

I'm grieving. Letting go of some people, my job, my primary focus. It's kind of like when a relationship ends. Even if you know it was the right thing, it still hurts. you still miss the other person, but at the same time you try not to think about them too much, and although part of you wants to see them, you know it would hurt, so you keep your distance.

That's where I am. I am teaching at a local learning center, working with kids preparing to take the SAT. I enjoy the one-on-one nature of the teaching; getting to know some neat kids.

I umpired one baseball game, hoping to get a lot more in the next few weeks.

I have enjoyed spending more time with my children. We spent the day at Kings Dominion today, it was wonderful. Nothing has ever given more joy than my kids--I love playing with them, watching them experience and enjoy life, laughing, reading, talking, singing, dancing. It's great.

We're winding up the day with another chapter of our John Hughes film festival, watching the second half of Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Good stuff.

today's random thoughts on health-care reform, government, and inconsistencies

OK, feeling kind of snarky today, just doing some thinking out loud (or in type)...I know I'm generalizing, stereotyping...but oh well. I know I come across as critical of republicans, conservatives, etc. But I do so as a former republican/conservative myself--I voted for Reagan, Bush, Dole, and W, before changing my perspective (a shift that began around 2003).

If you're interested in why I changed--I just felt that a lot of what I heard from conservative political and religious leaders did not match up well with the person and teachings of Jesus I saw in the Bible. I'll try to write about that sometime.

Back to today's thoughts: It seems that republicans/conservatives want government to stay out, except when they want government to help further their agenda.

Two examples:

1. The war in Iraq. The cost of the war is now over $678 billion, and increases about $3000 every SECOND. Many conservatives don't want the government to spend money on individuals and business who need help, yet have no problem spending this incredible amount on a war that began out of lies and false information.

2. Marriage Equality. It's not OK for people and churches to have the freedom to make their own decisions about marriage, conservatives want the GOVERNMENT to make that decision for everyone, by passing state and/or federal constitutional amendments limiting who can marry.

I hear people criticize the proposed health-care reform, mostly because they don't like how it will impact them. But how about the impact it will have on the poor, the disenfranchised, the helpless?

I understand not wanting more government involvement if it means those with power and money will gain more, and those with less will lose; but that doesn't seem to be the case here. I think the President and those with him on this truly want to do more to help more...to benefit "the least of these."

Isn't that something we can all get behind (especially those of us who are followers of Christ)?

Another thought...I hear people say we need reform, but not THIS reform. Didn't President Clinton attempt health-care reform? Wasn't it shot down, mostly by republicans? Didn't republicans have 8 years with W. to give reform a shot on their terms? I know they did some small improvements, but didn't really attempt anything to address the huge health-care crisis in our country.

OK, that ought to get some folks stirred up!